Paige Torosantucci

Wounded Fruit 2.

A series of paper fruits progressing through stages of decay to convey the idea of deterioration from chronic and mental illness.

“My father, Mark, had suffered from Multiple Sclerosis (MS) since I was born. This disease affects your central nervous system, causing the loss of the ability to speak, write, walk and see clearly. This disease can vary from person to person, and symptoms can range from mild to severe depending on the type of diagnosis you receive. Unfortunately, my father had suffered from the most severe form, Primary progressive MS (PPMS), which resulted in the loss of all bodily movement and affects only approximately 12% of people. As a result of my father’s diagnosis and symptoms, I was forced to see the process of bodily deterioration, which inevitably led to his death in 2019. This part of my life is not something I share often. I hid many of these memories and even my father’s passing from close friends, isolating the incident from my life. As I grew older, I felt as though I was missing a piece of myself and pretending that my father’s disease never existed didn't cause that gap to be filled. I wanted this assignment to focus on something close to me, something personal that may help someone else who is struggling with the same feeling or even feelings of deterioration themselves. During my proposal and process, I thought this journey could be healing for me, but it ended up bringing up more anger and pain that I had hidden away for so long. Feeling all these different emotions at once, I tried to use this process to channel them into what I was creating and combat the negative emotions by using vivid colours and creating a more beautiful rot than an ugly and gross one. This beauty helped me realize that there is more to what deterioration means than crumbling or falling apart. I can alleviate those feelings of grief by being present in what has happened, accepting it, and working on healing what has been lost. I chose to present the fruit as a pear, in a reminder of the good memories my father and I shared. We would garden and prune a pear tree in our backyard. A sacred moment of father-daughter bonding through food and nature. This pear tree still lives on in memory of my father, always bearing its branches with sweet and bright fruit. The background of the piece consists of curved lines, overlapping each other in various sizes. I wanted something in the work to portray movement and slowly get less chaotic as the series progressed, providing the viewers with the slow yet apparent change in mobility. I also wanted the background colour to enhance this mobility loss by the series starting with a strong vivid red to show power, and progressing to blue to show fatigue and grief. I decided on using paper as my medium since it was something new that I thought could challenge my artistic abilities, since my topic challenged my emotional capability. I used the process of stencils to create a symmetrical image for each stage of the pear and used layering of foam tape to create depth. The beads within the work were more of an afterthought. I felt the final image needed more than the flat surface area of the fruit and needed to create more texture. The beads also provided more beauty and crystallized the image into something that could present itself as more permanent than just paper. Creating a work like this was not something I had thought I would end up doing, but the outcome was worth the “forbidden” pain it had brought up. This process allowed me to begin my healing process. Grief has to start somewhere, so why not start in the first place I turn to for love and support? Art. ”